Is It Over Yet?

Well, sports fans, I'm afraid I am not pregnant.  I have yet to get my period, but all of my pregnancy symptoms have disappeared and I have gotten nothing but 'big fat negative' pregnancy tests.  In 4 more days, I'll test again.  If it is negative, I'll start another round of Provera to bring on a period. 

I had a break-down-and-cry day a few days ago.  I was so down in the dumps that I didn't even write about it here.  Thankfully, I have a loving, supportive husband who helped carry me out of my pit of dispair.  Love that man!

If I have to take Provera to start a period (and it is looking that way), my next cycle will be our last chance for a 2010 baby.  Wowza.

Patiently Waiting

I'm at 11 DPO.  I took a pregnancy test yesterday morning and this morning.  Both times were negative, but it is still early in the game.  I just couldn't wait to start testing!  I'm having a lot of symptoms, so I'm hoping this is it!

• Tender, heavier breasts (my very first sign with both of my pregnancies)
• Occasional dizziness
• Slight nausea
• Feeling hungry faster
• Skin breakouts

Since I took Clomid, it is hard to say if these things are due to pregnancy or just lingering side effects from the medication.  Hopefully we'll know very, very soon!  I'll keep you posted!

Ladies and Gentlemen, We Have Crosshairs!

...and solid ones at that!  I just entered data into fertiltyfriend.com and it says that I ovulated a few days ago.  I don't ovulate on my own, so this is huge!  We'll see in a couple of weeks if it was successful!

Long Time, No Post

What the heck happened to me?  Who knows.  I get distracted easily.  :)

Let's see...I took Clomid on CD 5-9.  My side effects while taking the pills were mostly minimal.  I felt a little more on edge, had some acne break outs, and experienced some vertigo from time to time.  Other than that, it was smooth sailing.

I'm now on CD 17.  It has yet to be determined if I have ovulated or will ovulate.  However, I started to feel some twinges a few days ago.  I brushed them off, thinking maybe it was ovulation.  Tonight, the twinges have been more like period cramps, so I did some investigating.  Upon poking around on my lower abdomen, I found a tender, swollen area under the skin.  If my memory serves me correctly, this is exactly how things played out on my last cycle of Clomid.  That tender, swollen area grew to be the size of my hand.  My doctor said that if I develop a cyst, I'll have to take the next cycle off to allow it to go down.  That's what happened last time and looks like the path I'm walking down now.

The upside to all of this is...the cycle I had to take off due to a cyst before was when I became pregnant.  Then again, that ended in miscarriage, so it may be a Catch 22.

As usual, only time will tell...

Progress

In case you didn't see, I am now on CD 3.  After waiting for quite a while, Provera finally came through and brought on my period.  In two days, I will begin Clomid again.  I hope that the side effects are not as bad this time around.

Anyway, that's about it!

Letting Go

I'm preparing now to become a full-time college student.  I thought for a moment--again--about waiting to try for another baby until I am finished with school.  That would make my daughter at least 7 years older than her sibling.  I was so sad about the idea of waiting, but thought it would probably be best.  Then, I talked to my husband about it.  I asked what he wanted to do and he said that we should just keep trying.  We don't know how long it will take to have another baby at this point, and we'll worry about daycare and school when we come to it.

I truly believe that we will have another child when the correct time comes...in my heart.  In my mind, I'm always planning.  Always counting out nine months from each new month on the calendar.  Always stressing out about the future.  There isn't anything I can do about it, though, so I'm trying to let go and relax.  I'm going to keep on trying, taking my fertility meds, etc., but know that a baby won't happen before he or she was meant to.  If we get pregnant right now, we'll have a late October/early November baby (see--I told you!), and I have to have faith that it will be okay.  I also have to have faith that it will happen.  Eventually.  When it's supposed to.  Right?

Woops!

Apparently, I either cannot read or don't know what year it is.  Either way, the trip to England that the choir I'm trying out for is taking is this spring, not next spring.  Honestly, that was my whole reason to consider taking a break trying for a baby.  So, I guess it's game on (at least for now)!