I have a baby monitor, crib sheets, a baby wrap/carrier, and sleep sack on the way. I also bought a mattress for the crib today. This weekend, I'll be completing the crib set.
This isn't much of a post, but I'm too excited not to share.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Walk-Through
Today, our social worker did an informal walk-through on our house. She was looking for potential safety issues that would cause a delay when we have our official home study done by the state. I was very concerned about having her come over, because I am not the world's greatest housekeeper. She was supposed to come last week, but I asked her to wait because I was gone all week and had no chance to pick things up. This week was a little less hectic, but I still didn't get everything spotless. She was very nice about it and said it isn't necessary for the house to pass a white-glove test. We still need to put child locks on the cabinets, change out a couple of outlets, and install the CO detectors. There are some other house-keeping issues that I want to get taken care of, but we will have a few weeks to a month and a half to get them completed.
We are also nearing the end of our classes. Our social worker said there may be an immediate placement for us, or we may have to wait for some time. I'm willing to do what it takes to get the right child for us...even if that means waiting. We've waited this long--we've got nothing but time at this point.
I feel relieved to have the initial walk-through done, but I am exhausted from all of the stress. I'm turning in early tonight!
We are also nearing the end of our classes. Our social worker said there may be an immediate placement for us, or we may have to wait for some time. I'm willing to do what it takes to get the right child for us...even if that means waiting. We've waited this long--we've got nothing but time at this point.
I feel relieved to have the initial walk-through done, but I am exhausted from all of the stress. I'm turning in early tonight!
Thursday, February 3, 2011
One Year Ago
This post is off-topic, but still fitting for my blog.
One year ago, I sat down to watch the 10 o'clock news and my stomach instantly dropped. I had spoken to my husband a few hours before and he hung up suddenly, giving me a bad feeling that wouldn't go away. The breaking news at the top of the hour was that seven firefighters were hospitalized for carbon monoxide poisoning. The news didn't give any names, but I just knew that it was him. I frantically dialed the emergency room and learned that he was there, indeed. I ran around in circles for a little while after that, trying to decide what to do. Our daughter had been in bed for a few hours and I did not want to wake her. I eventually called my mom and asked her to come sit at our house while I went to the hospital. I waited for what seemed like forever for her to get here and then rushed out the door. I wasn't able to talk to him, so I had no idea how he was. I finally arrived at the hospital after a white-knuckled drive to town (thirty minutes from where we live) and had to stand in line to talk to the lady at the registration desk. A cop had brought in a drunk man and he was giving them a hard time. After about twenty minutes of standing, I asked someone else in scrubs if they could give me any information. She told me only the lady at registration could. When I was able to speak with her, she let me know that he had been released ten minutes prior. I rushed out the doors and over to the fire station. When I got there, he was already in his truck, getting ready to drive home. I flagged him down and we got out and hugged and talked a little bit. I was worried about him driving home, but he told me the doctor said it would be okay. (I'm still not sure if that's true or not...lol) He was sent home for the rest of the shift, though.
I was upset that he didn't call me, but he apparently told everyone not to call. He didn't want to worry me. We had a very frank discussion about how I need to know if anything happens, even if he thinks he'll be okay. He recovered after several hours on high oxygen therapy, but he was very close to having to be hospitalized overnight. They had (unknowingly) been exposed to an extremely high level of CO and started feeling light-headed after just a couple of minutes in the house.
I usually feel pretty confident in my husband's abilities and the reliability of his co-workers to keep him safe. I don't typically lose a lot of sleep over his job. However, I had a hard time coping with this particular incident. He and his fellow firefighters could have easily died--another minute in that house could have been the end of them. I'm so thankful that they are all here with us today. I don't know what I would do without him.
One year ago, I sat down to watch the 10 o'clock news and my stomach instantly dropped. I had spoken to my husband a few hours before and he hung up suddenly, giving me a bad feeling that wouldn't go away. The breaking news at the top of the hour was that seven firefighters were hospitalized for carbon monoxide poisoning. The news didn't give any names, but I just knew that it was him. I frantically dialed the emergency room and learned that he was there, indeed. I ran around in circles for a little while after that, trying to decide what to do. Our daughter had been in bed for a few hours and I did not want to wake her. I eventually called my mom and asked her to come sit at our house while I went to the hospital. I waited for what seemed like forever for her to get here and then rushed out the door. I wasn't able to talk to him, so I had no idea how he was. I finally arrived at the hospital after a white-knuckled drive to town (thirty minutes from where we live) and had to stand in line to talk to the lady at the registration desk. A cop had brought in a drunk man and he was giving them a hard time. After about twenty minutes of standing, I asked someone else in scrubs if they could give me any information. She told me only the lady at registration could. When I was able to speak with her, she let me know that he had been released ten minutes prior. I rushed out the doors and over to the fire station. When I got there, he was already in his truck, getting ready to drive home. I flagged him down and we got out and hugged and talked a little bit. I was worried about him driving home, but he told me the doctor said it would be okay. (I'm still not sure if that's true or not...lol) He was sent home for the rest of the shift, though.
I was upset that he didn't call me, but he apparently told everyone not to call. He didn't want to worry me. We had a very frank discussion about how I need to know if anything happens, even if he thinks he'll be okay. He recovered after several hours on high oxygen therapy, but he was very close to having to be hospitalized overnight. They had (unknowingly) been exposed to an extremely high level of CO and started feeling light-headed after just a couple of minutes in the house.
I usually feel pretty confident in my husband's abilities and the reliability of his co-workers to keep him safe. I don't typically lose a lot of sleep over his job. However, I had a hard time coping with this particular incident. He and his fellow firefighters could have easily died--another minute in that house could have been the end of them. I'm so thankful that they are all here with us today. I don't know what I would do without him.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Look What I Can Do!
Today, I spent allllll day at my mom's house learning to sew. I think the last time I touched a sewing machine was in 8th grade Home Ec. when I did a horrible job on my quillo. When I chose this pattern and material, my mom said she'd help me with it, but that it would be my project. She helped me understand the instructions and get started. She guided me the rest of the way, but I did all the cutting and sewing on my own.
This is the quilt. I need to sew the batting and backing on and then it will be complete.
This a piece of the crib skirt. I have some detail stitching to finish on the rest of the pieces and then need to sew it to the base. (Note the crib and the white breathable bumper :D )
ABC's
Our social worker asked us to write a letter to our future child and provide some pictures for them to see before coming to our house. I decided to make an ABC book instead. I'm still working on A and Q and am open to suggestions! Here are a few of the highlights:
I Lost a Subscriber :(
Something that is a little bit exciting for me is to watch the number of subscribers to my blog. Thus far, the numbers keep going up. However, today I noticed that I lost one. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone, but these are my feelings here in black and white.
My last post was a vent, obviously. Writing is cathartic to me and allows me to get everything out on "paper" so that I can go about my merry way in real life. I am extremely grateful for the blessings I have in my life. My husband and daughter are my world and as long as I have them, I can keep going no matter what curve ball is thrown my way. I don't sit about the house and feel sorry for myself (generally), but this journey is a long and arduous one...and I've only just begun. Having a safe place to discuss how I'm feeling at any particular moment helps me tremendously. Knowing that people read what I write makes it feel worthwhile to put out there. So, hang in there with me. I'm not perfect and I have my bad days. I'm sure I'm not the only one. :)
My last post was a vent, obviously. Writing is cathartic to me and allows me to get everything out on "paper" so that I can go about my merry way in real life. I am extremely grateful for the blessings I have in my life. My husband and daughter are my world and as long as I have them, I can keep going no matter what curve ball is thrown my way. I don't sit about the house and feel sorry for myself (generally), but this journey is a long and arduous one...and I've only just begun. Having a safe place to discuss how I'm feeling at any particular moment helps me tremendously. Knowing that people read what I write makes it feel worthwhile to put out there. So, hang in there with me. I'm not perfect and I have my bad days. I'm sure I'm not the only one. :)
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
One Step Back
Maybe today isn't really a step back, but I'm feeling angry. I'm angry that we lost our baby well over a year ago. I'm angry that (nearly) everyone else can get and stay pregnant. I'm angry that I probably caused my own miscarriage, but had no idea that I was harming my unborn child. I'm angry that I said, "I'll never do this again," when I felt the first waves of morning sickness. (Two days later, I miscarried). I'm angry that I'll probably never feel a baby kick or experience birth again. I'm angry that I'll probably never get the chance to attempt nursing again. I'm angry that we'll probably never have a son who looks just like his daddy. I'm angry that the only way we are going to be able to build our family is through adoption. I'm angry that in order to adopt, we have to jump through hoops and cut through red tape. I'm angry that a child we become attached to may end up back with their abusive/negligent birth parents, despite everything we've already been through.
I don't always feel this way and I haven't even been sad lately. My feelings do not diminish my desire to adopt. However, today is hard. I suppose I'm still bouncing around in the stages of grief.
I don't always feel this way and I haven't even been sad lately. My feelings do not diminish my desire to adopt. However, today is hard. I suppose I'm still bouncing around in the stages of grief.
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